Happiness if the default state of mind, so when the mind becomes calm and clear, it returns to its default, and that default is happiness. Chade-Meng Tan.
Are you controlling your mind? Most likely your mind controls you. 90% of what you do daily is automatic.
Your mind has two modes:
Your survivor mode is dominated by your fears. Fear of not being loved, fear of being rejected, fear of death. When you live surrounded by fears, you trigger your fight or fly response, which over-rides your prefrontal cortex and doesn't let you think creatively, you either punch or run away. In today's world neither of them will help you, when your boss, friends and family trigger you. Over-reacting goes against your interests because nobody likes people who gets easily upset.
On the other hand you were born to thrive. As a kid, you follow your dreams, explore all the new things and are not afraid of falling or rejection.
Zig Ziglar talks about the 4 stages, all starting with s:
The only moment you can live is now. The past is gone and the future may never come, so you can only live in the present moment. Learn to enjoy each moment as if it were your last, and one day it will be. Yesterday ended last night, so stop focusing on the past or future and start working on the present moment. Some people think about their family when they are at work, and when they are with their family they think about their work.
Happiness is not something you pursue, happiness is something you allow. Chade-Meng Tan
References:
Shirzad Chamine: "Positive Intelligence"
Search inside yourself. Chade-Meng Tan